terrapinsanity.com

Great article in today’s WSJ, The Ultimate Power Hobby: “Bankers, Lawyers, Executives Jockey to Teach a University Class, Play Professor.”

Pretending to be a scholar is cool, and it happens a lot in College Park (which explains some of our ratings) but it hardly counts as the ultimate power hobby. That title goes to pretending to be a leader.

A long-awaited, much sought – and quite feared – study of graduate programs finally appeared from the National Research Council, and the reaction from those in the rarefied regions of Main Admin make clear they know what everyone else is eagerly vanity surfing to find out: it may not be good news for College Park.

Several years in the making and reflecting data initially collected several years ago, the report has been available to leadership here but was embargoed from release for weeks. It only broke today, and first reports suggest an eagerness to make it old news with confusing tech talk quickly. The Sun report just tracks the College Park press release, which discusses at length the different statistical ways some programs might actually be seen as having fared well.

On campus, the pre-released information to legislators was controlled as if launch codes to a missile defense system, and inquiries as to status only met with denials, stony-faced stares or dour shrugs. Everyone was ordered to direct all external requests to an official spokesman in public relations, and then the stonewall was erected.

The truth is, this NRC study does take a fair amount of reading to decipher, but since the Provost has had this for weeks, you can bet that if the news was good for doctoral programs, their press releases would lead with that as the punch line – not dump a mealy-mouthed discourse on how in some circumstances with the right phase of the moon you can just barely see how the programs could have been doing well here.

Who are big losers? Time will tell, but likely one will be Steve Halperin, dean of the College of Computer, Mathematical and Physical Sciences, which will soon absorb Chemical and Life Sciences in a hostile takeover. This “merger” was an exercise in empire building, engineered and rammed through as the ultimate ego-trip for a few administrators. More to the point, it was based on some hand wave at how great a job Halperin has been doing. Awkwardly, early data from the new NRC report may actually show a decline in programs that were once more highly rated and – before Halperin’s watch – on the rise. Oops.

Let’s have at those numbers, shall we?

Ahh, the classic commute in. (Do we need to close Route 1 during rush hour for construction? Really? Again?)

The early confirmation that we are maintaining business as usual. (“Muggings continue …” on WBAL.)

The morning homily from leadership about our strong sense of community. (Responding to the deteriorating climate at sports events, Provost Nariman Farvardin confirms he has “bigger fish to fry…”)

The incoming president, Wallace Loh, announces his investment in our future. (How nice that he gets a press release and tax deduction for his donation. When the campus needs funds from the rest of us it just takes it in more furlough days. Loh must be awful special that he gets a decision to make.)

It could worse. It could be raining.

A campus-wide email came to our attention from UMCP Acting President Nariman Farvardin:

You are cordially invited to attend the University’s Constitution Day
Celebration tomorrow, Tuesday, September 14, 2010, from 4:00 to 5:00
p.m., in the Prince George’s Room on the first floor of the Stamp
Student Union. The federal government’s Consolidated Appropriations Act
of 2005 requires all educational institutions that receive federal funds
to hold an educational program on the United States Constitution.

Our featured speaker will be Mr. Thomas Perez, Assistant Attorney
General of the United States Department of Justice Civil Rights
Division. Prior to his nomination as Assistant Attorney General, Mr.
Perez spent many years as a consumer advocate, civil rights public
service lawyer, and law professor. We are honored that Mr. Perez will
speak about one of our country’s most important documents.

Oh… We get it… Tom Perez works for the Department of Justice so he’s qualified to teach UMCP students about our Constitution. We concur.  To help the students get the best possible educational experience, here are some starter suggestions for topics Mr. Perez might address in his speech:

1) The role of the federal government in state and local law enforcement. Begin by explaining the nature of the DoJ’s lawsuits against the governments of the State of Arizona and Arizona’s Maricopa County, making sure to highlight the copious evidence DoJ no doubt has to indicate wrongdoing may be afoot.

2) How, given that he served as president of the pro-illegal immigration organization Casa de Maryland, does he reconcile the advocacy of the former with his new-found belief in the supremacy of the federal government over state and local law in matters of immigration.

3) When, in his opinion, should the prosecution of the Philadelphia New Black Panthers – a group as guilty of civil and election rights violations as guilty can get – be taken up anew by the Holder Justice Department?

The WBAL headline is No letup in College Park Crime Spree, reporting on just that, the recent string of robberies and attacks that have been picking up.

The good news is that we have better relations between police and the community. Thanks to that swell welcome back party, doggonit, we feel good about safety on campus.

Those miscreants who are mugging students? Must not have been able to rap with officials at the event. Maybe we need another party.

We can’t pass up an opportunity to visit some of the stories that came up during our summer hiatus. The stalled ‘east campus’ projects – stalled from a combination of bad economy and inexpert administrative handling – were announced as being activated by opening negotiations with Cordish (a firm that specializes in development), to find out what is the art of the possible.

Cordish of course is one of the champions of gaming in Maryland, and is best known locally for is controversial advocacy for slots at Arundel Mills mall, just up the BW parkway from us here in College Park. Locals are up in arms over Cordish’s bullying tactics, and a number of local and state legislators may soon give up their seats (coming election) for having played ball with the company. If the referendum of people fighting Cordish win, maybe we get slots in College Park?

Great choice there, guys.

Nothing says ‘rubber stamp’ better than leadership’s expectation that the campus senate will process several major proposals in one busy voting session on the 16th of this month.

Already on the agenda is the merger of two major colleges, Computer, Mathematical and Physical Sciences with Chemical and Life Sciences. Well, not a merger – a hostile takeover is more like it. CLFS has effectively ceased to exist, killed by fiat, and its units absorbed administratively into the regime of Steve Halperin, the CMPS Dean. This was a coup worthy of any good banana republic: no substantive reviews have been performed, no serious analysis of cost versus benefit produced, a vote of faculty and staff (that was not a secret ballot, and was overtly monitored by supervisors, with the obvious chilling effect) and the very first meeting at which faculty in one of the colleges could have voiced question or concern in open forum only occurred last week. Yes, after it all happened, and conveniently scheduled at the last minute during a time least populated by faculty about to return to campus for fall semester. What is so important that it must be implemented without a fair and open vetting of the issues among stakeholders? We’ll never know from the senate meeting, that’s for sure.

Add to the agenda approval of the new diversity plan. Let’s review: this plan has had a couple abortive attempts at advancing over the last year, each time panned by the community. We don’t envy the proponents this task – no question, this is a tough one to handle – but the solution now isn’t any better, which is, rush through edits they want, forget any new round of public vetting and slide it into a senate calendar packed with monkey business. [President Mote's announcement about this - sent in his name after we actually thought he was officially gone - is appended.]

Will senator push back and demand some serious involvement in these fundamental questions? Or meekly serve as the rubber stamp that leadership obviously seeks? We’ll know soon enough.

Date: Tue, 31 Aug 2010 18:00:54 -0400 (EDT)
From: “President C. D. Mote, Jr.”
To: “University of Maryland Community”:;
Subject: UM Diversity Strategic Plan

Dear University of Maryland Family:

I am very pleased to announce that the Diversity Strategic Plan
Committee has completed its work on the plan, Transforming Maryland:
Expectations for Excellence in Diversity and Inclusion. Diversity at
the University of Maryland is a cornerstone of our excellence, adding
value to our educational, work and social environments. Creating
environments that are rich in diversity, inclusive and supportive of all
members of our community enriches our campus exponentially.

In order to cultivate diversity even further, the diversity strategic
plan outlines goals and strategies to which the University commits
itself. Maintaining working and learning environments in which all
members of our community can flourish is the essence of the plan and I
am confident it will be achieved.

The University is grateful to the Diversity Strategic Plan Committee,
led by Dr. Robert Waters, and to the hundreds of campus members who
contributed their inputs. The diligence with which the plan was crafted
is apparent. The Senate Executive Committee has forwarded the plan to
the University Senate for consideration at its September 16th meeting.

Our vision for the next decade is to be a model diverse community of
learning, exploration and self examination. I am confident that we have
the commitment, the people and now the plan to realize this vision.

Yours sincerely,

C. D. Mote, Jr.
President

********************

This note was authorized for distribution to
University of Maryland Community by:
President C. D. Mote, Jr.