terrapinsanity.com

… but it isn’t like this is the PR campus needs. Basketball player Pe’Shon Howard criminally cited for disorderly conduct in the middle of the night on campus town last night.

The Diamondback reveals what everyone should have figured out the moment President Loh rolled on the Purple Line plans coming through campus: The “M” must go. But don’t worry. The facilities person in charge, Facilities Management Director Carlo Colella, assures us the change will be an “enhancement” even though we don’t yet know where it will be.

Well that’s comforting.

Leadership will actually be relieved if the community can focus concerns over things like the iconic traffic circle on campus, since that can be moved for comparatively little expense, and the whole time people blather about that they will not be protesting against the far greater problems we will experience from Metro’s unprecedented at-grade crossings embedded in a pedestrian-rich environment like a college campus. Wait until they lay on you that, for safety, maybe they better put up safety barriers after all, cutting the campus in half.

But no worries. Carlo will surely emerge to tell us that is an “enhancement” too. That’ll make it all better.

By the closest of margins, the UMBC chess team just missed locking in another national championship, coming in second in this year’s event. They’re one of the consistent winners in the state, and at a darn sight less cost than, say, football at the flagship.

Congrats all around nonetheless!

For a good use of a few moments of your quality time this holiday between semesters, we commend to you the short article A Perfect Storm in Undergraduate Education.

The author asks a key question about national leaders’ priorities: “What good does it do to increase the number of students in college if the ones who are already there are not learning much? Would it not make more sense to improve the quality of education before we increase the quantity of students?”

Hmm, excellence. Where have we heard that before?

The article gives a laundry list of the sundry barriers to improvement, and the author might well have been studying the College Park campus when painting this sad picture.

Part of Randy Edsall’s new training regimen perhaps? We knew he was tough but this does seem a little over the top…

(And more is the pity.)

Commenting in the Diamondback on a penalty that called back a Terrapin score in this weekend’s Wake Forest game:

“We had that one kind of penalty, it was like illegal motion or some shit,” defensive tackle Joe Vellano said.

Communications major, no doubt.

Nothing projects the real reason we have a campus better than telling scholars to get the hell out of town to make room for football.

If you are graduate student working hard on your PhD, a faculty research assistant responsible for the care of key experiments or any student who needs access to campus facilities, then don’t park around these parts or else you will be towed to make way for revelry that rakes in big money for the athletic association.

Faculty and staff? Good news – you can park here as usual, unless of course your lot is one of the list of exceptions (which is about all of the likely lots.) If you make the mistake of needing to work with students then, as you see in your DOTS parking alert (copied below), you can try to get to campus, as they have grudgingly made a handful of slots available to you so long as you all promise not to distract the party-goers apply for a permit enough in advance. To do this each person must contact the DOTS office during business hours, documenting your need, being sure to provide your “a UID, a printed schedule of classes or a letter from an academic advisor or professor.” Remember, “Documentation must be presented to staff at the main lobby desk.”

Kind of makes you feel all warm and fuzzy, huh.

Date: Mon, 10 Oct 2011 09:45:57
From: DOTS 
Subject: [PARKING-ALERT2] MD Football vs. Clemson - Saturday, October 15

October 10, 2011

Dear Parking Registrant:

Welcome to the 2011-2012 school year!  Periodically throughout the fall
semester, the University of Maryland football team will play at Capital One
Field at Byrd Stadium, which will result in parking modifications. This
year, seven home games are scheduled. The fourth home game against Clemson
will be held on Saturday, October 15, 2011 at 7 p.m. 

If you are planning to travel to campus during these event days, please
consider using Quick Bus to avoid the traffic congestion.  You can take the
Quick Bus from the College Park Metro Station to Lot Q, which is very close
to Byrd Stadium.  It runs every 20 minutes three hours prior to kick-off,
and every 10 minutes two hours prior to kick-off from the College Park Metro
station to Lot Q.  Quick Bus also runs back to the College Park Metro
Station from Lot Q for one hour after the game.

Quick Bus is also available from lots 4, 9, and 11 (Comcast), and from Lot
16 (Frat Row) to Lot Q.  Service from Mowatt Lane Garage to Cole Field House
is available on a more limited schedule.

Academic Commitments - The Department of Transportation Services will
provide those UMCP faculty/staff and students with classes or other
documented academic commitments on game day Saturdays a one-day, temporary
surface lot permit valid at Regents Drive Garage, Mowatt Lane Garage, and
Terrapin Trail Garage on game day Saturdays only. 

We recommend that arrangements be made in advance through the academic
department to secure enough permits for the entire class prior to the start
of the season. All are encouraged to secure the permit as early as possible.
Students should check with professors to determine if arrangements have
already been made.

Permits will be available immediately at the Department of Transportation
Services located in Regents Drive Garage. Office hours are Monday-Friday,
8:15 a.m. - 4 p.m. A departmental representative may call the Department of
Transportation Services at (301) 314-PARK to make arrangements.
Documentation will be required and includes a UID, a printed schedule of
classes or a letter from an academic advisor or professor. Documentation
must be presented to staff at the main lobby desk. 

Faculty/staff Parking Registrants on campus for any academic commitments
WILL have full access to their assigned parking areas Any faculty/staff
permit holder having difficulty accessing their assigned areas may call 301
314-0318 for immediate assistance. The following exceptions apply: 

Lot C Parking Registrants - Lot C1 will not be available for use during
football games. Lot C Parking Registrants may park in Lot C2 or L on game
days. Overflow parking is available in Lot K or 16 behind Ritchie Coliseum.

Lot FF Parking Registrants - Lot FF1 will not be available for use during
football games.  FF1 Parking Registrants may move their vehicles to Lot K4,
FF2 or RDG beginning six hours prior to kick-off.

Lot JJ Parking Registrants - Lot JJ3 will not be available for use during
football games. Lot JJ3 is the row of numbered spaces located directly
behind Tawes Theater. JJ Parking Registrants may park in JJ1 or JJ2 on game
days.  

Lot MM Parking Registrants - Lot MM3 will not be available for use during
football games. Lot MM Parking Registrants may park in Lot MM1 or MM2 on
game days. Overflow parking is available in Lot 2f.

Lot Q Parking Registrants - Lot Q will be used as a staging area for the
buses taking spectators to and from the Metro station. Access to Lot Q will
be restricted after 6 p.m. the Friday evening before each game. After 6
p.m., Lot Q Parking Registrants will be given limited access to the
restricted Lot Q spaces closest to the Computer Science Building. When
parking is not available in these restricted spaces, Lot Q Parking
Registrants will be permitted to park in Regents Drive Garage, free of
charge.  

Stadium Drive Garage Parking Registrants - The south side of SDG (SD*) will
be unavailable after midnight the Friday evening before each game. Those SD*
Parking Registrants needing to remain on campus during this time should move
their vehicles to the spaces on the north side of the garage.  SD* permits
will be allowed access to the north side of the garage ONLY during the
games.

Lot Z Parking Registrants - Lot Z will be unavailable for use during
football games.  Limited space will be available in Regents Drive Garage and
Mowatt Lane Garage. Lot Z Parking Registrants working at the Stamp Union or
in its vicinity on game days will be permitted to park in Union Lane Garage
free of charge. Parking in Union Lane Garage is subject to space
availability.

Faculty/Staff Parking Registrants Attending the Game - There will be limited
space available at Regents Drive Garage (RDG) for faculty/staff Parking
Registrants who plan to attend the game. The overflow areas will be Mowatt
Lane Garage (MLG) or Terrapin Trail Garage (TTG). Campus Parking Registrants
attending the game are expected to utilize these free areas. Parking for
faculty/staff parking registrants in Regents Drive Garage will be limited to
Lot 5 on the roof of the garage.

Parking Registrants who are planning to visit the campus on a Saturday
should refer to the following home game schedule:  

If you require additional information or have questions, please feel free to
call (301) 314-PARK or visit our Web site at
 http://www.transportation.umd.edu/. We
appreciate your patience and cooperation.

Go Terps!

Sincerely,

Department of Transportation Services

Improving the community environment surrounding campus is correctly seen by our leaders as critical to our future. It’s hard to recruit top faculty who would need only one visit to learn there is no safe or affordable housing to be had, for example. Their choice is between a grid-locked, race-obsessed county whose crime rates start with the officials running it and go up from there, or commuting either from a place where $1 million gets you a little fixer-upper or an affordable locale that’s a good two hours away.

Even in the last week leadership has canvassed faculty and staff for input on housing (though questions in that survey look jiggered so answers can only justify some pet projects no matter what – likely the topic of another post later.)

They don’t need to conduct a faculty survey to see the obvious, however, and that’s the seedy environment you see driving in on Route 1. No, we’re not talking about Madame Flora (the palm reader), the tattoo parlors, all-night diners or boarded-up car dealerships. We refer to the newly-erected Varsity.

Today’s Diamondback reports on the quality of life in this campus-launched venture (one that needs a lot more study to see who is really making money on this one.) It quotes property manager Barbara Steinke’s memo to residents thus:

“My previous communications have been polite and informative, but now I’m forced to take a stronger approach,” she wrote before explaining that it was “completely unacceptable” for residents and their guests to be “tearing directional and safety signs off of walls, stealing pictures, punching holes in walls, destroying exit signs, breaking glass in stairwells and hallways, vomiting in the hallway, gum on the carpet, dumping trash in the hallways.”

We can’t remember even the first time we encountered this kind of activity in Madame Flora’s parking lot up Route 1.

If UM doesn’t want a seedy College Park environment, then maybe the campus should stop building it.

The twitterverse was busy debating Maryland Terp’s new football uniform. Some like it, some think it is a crime. No seriously, it might be a crime. The jersey is based on the Maryland state flag, and it is against the law to place advertising on the flag (hmm, too bad Under Armor) or use it for crass commercial purposes. You be the judge …

CRIMINAL LAW
TITLE 10. CRIMES AGAINST PUBLIC HEALTH, CONDUCT, AND SENSIBILITIES
SUBTITLE 7. MARYLAND UNIFORM FLAG LAW

Md. CRIMINAL LAW Code Ann. § 10-703 (2011)

§ 10-703. Marked flag and merchandise

(a) Scope of section. — This section applies to a flag of the United States or of this State, or a flag that is authorized by law of the United States or of this State.

(b) Prohibited — Advertising marking. — For exhibition or display, a person may not place or cause to be placed a word, figure, mark, picture, design, or advertisement of any nature on a flag.

(c) Same — Public display of marked flag. — A person may not publicly exhibit a flag with a word, figure, mark, picture, design, or advertisement printed, painted, or produced on or attached to the flag.

(d) Same — Merchandise marked with flag. — A person may not publicly display for sale, manufacture, or otherwise, or sell, give, or possess for sale or for use as a gift or for any other purpose, an article of merchandise or receptacle on which a flag is produced or attached to advertise, decorate, or mark the merchandise.

(e) Penalty. — A person who violates this section is guilty of a misdemeanor and on conviction is subject to a fine not exceeding $ 500.

HISTORY: An. Code 1957, art. 27, §§ 82, 85; 2002, ch. 26, § 2.

Bedbug outbreak on campus … just what parents love to hear during yield season, when administrators are intent on convincing admitted students to confirm with College Park for the fall.